Computer Woes!

I am having computer issues today. Of course, this computer is like a dinosaur, so it is not exactly a surprise. Combine that with the fact that I have been asking for a new one for at least three years and you see my frustration. My husband, of course, has his work computer, so has little need or desire to spend more time on one when at home. Consequently, he does not see a new computer as much of a priority. I, on the other hand, whose primary conversation companion happens to be a two year old, see the computer as my link to the outside, adult world. I chat with the other mother's from Isabelle's play group; keep in touch with my friends across the country, and of course, shop. Needless to say at this time of year it might as well be attached to me physically. So, take note: All I want for Christmas is a new computer!

Mine!

About two weeks ago, Isabelle began what I call the "Mine" phase of her toddler years. I imagine it is what most people refer to as the terrible twos. It goes something like this:

Me: "Belle? Do you want me to help you?" (watching her shake her doll furiously, trying to get the plastic brush out of it's tangled hair)

Isabelle: "NO!!!!!! It is MINE!"

Me: "Yes, I know the doll is yours, but can I just help you get the brush out?"

Isabelle: "NOooooooooo!!!!! MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (getting red in the face and starting to hyperventilate, still flinging doll around and tugging on hair)

Me: "Isabelle, calm down. Will you let Mommy show you how to get the brush untangled, please?" (Me reaching for the doll while trying to maintain my cool)

Isabelle: "NO, NO, NO!!!!! (collapsing on the floor into a full fledged kicking and screaming tantrum)

Me: "Fine then, you let me know when you are done throwing a fit and want some help." (me walking from room, which further escalates Isabelle into new throws of passion)

Now before you believe my child to be one of those maniac, zero-disciplined children that run their parents into the ground let me reassure you, she is not. Frankly, by most people's standards I am fairly old school and am more firm with my child then many other mothers I know. I believe in a schedule, regular bed times, please and thank you, balanced meals, and a house that is first and foremost run by the parents. Above all whining will not be tolerated. However, many times lately it just has to be ignored. Belle has a stubborn, bull-headed side (I mostly blame her father for that) and never does things the easy way. And as any parent will tell you, it is real easy to stand on the side lines and watch a tantrum happening and pass judgement, but once that child is your kid, the game changes and you have a new appreciation and understanding. I have come to realize that I can put her in time out and try and show her other ways to manage her anger, and can explain repeatedly that not everything is hers, and that screaming "MINE" at the top of her lungs might put some people off, but she also just has to out grow it. So, I guess it is just the terrible twos.

In the mean time I should invest in some ear plugs or maybe a sensory deprivation chamber!

Alternate universes and your DNA

In an alternate universe I am some music groupie, chasing my favorite rock band across the country from concert to concert. I drive a jeep wrangler with my dog riding shotgun and spend my evenings dancing to a band like Three Doors Down or Five for Fighting. Of course, money is no worry as I either have some huge inheritance or get odd jobs along the way to pay for gas and food. You know, like all the people on tv shows, who live outrageously while never working a day in their lives. Yup, that is me.... maybe I even have a tattoo.



In this universe though I am a stay at home mom, own two cats, live in a small town in a nice neighborhood, and I am sure (by most people's standards) live a quiet, uneventful life. My daughter, Isabelle, is two years old and pretty much runs my day to day. And of course, no tattoos.... my husband would kill me! (and I cannot imagine ever liking something enough to permanently affix it to my body anyways).



Yeah, the truth of the matter is that you cannot escape your DNA. While I love my little alternate universe and periodically fantasize about being someone compeletely different (mind you that rocker version of me does actually exist in a small form inside my conservative self), I am truly who I am meant to be. When I first started college, I had this idea that I was going to shake things up a bit and be more social, more outgoing and not focus so much on grades (yes, I was the classic bookish, slightly nerdish one in high school). Well, for the first semester I met lots of people and had fun and did not study as much as I probably could have. Then the grades came in, and I discovered that I had earned all B's and one A. I remember being pissed off. Granted most of the people I was hanging with thought that was great and would have killed for those grades. Especially since most of them flunked out and did not return for my sophomore year. Yet, I was ticked because I knew those grades were not reflective of my intelligence. I couldn't be relaxed about school because that just wasn't me. Just like I never drank a drop of alcohol until I was 21 years old (yes, it is true and now you believe me to be a total Polly Anna) and I wouldn't date someone just so I wasn't dateless. What can I say? It is in your DNA; at your core you are who you are, and while you might fight it and tweek it here and there, ultimately you will always return to your basic values, beliefs and predispostions.



So, I embrace my conservative, obsessive-compulsive, slightly boring, bookish, self and find plenty to laugh and rejoice about in my day to day. And why not write it down for my own amusement... with luck you will find it amusing too.